Dusk and Summer

It's been months since my last post. I don't know whether it was because I lost all mental-verbal ability to transform my thoughts into written prose or because I just didn't have anything I felt I had to publish onto this virtual platform. I guess my involvement cyber-wise reached a pinnacle with the notorious formspring.me, I became ashamed of myself when I realised its subconscious striving for attention amongst its holders, and the brazen insecurity/cruelty/pathetic nature of its posters. In an honesty that's been stripped of all metaphors and lengthy often confusing sentences: I've had the worst time since last summer. I haven't enjoyed being me very much. And I've particularly resented the world I live in. At times, my rationality gets complacent and I get scared and hateful of a planet that seems to be inhabited by the worst examples of humanity and I fear for my future, if there is one. I came to realise that I have to live in a world where for 85% of the time I live in a state of what I'd consider rational apathy, and worry only about what decisions to make and not the fact that work ethic and self-sufficiency has reached an all time low, and the planet is becoming just like Transmetropolitan- just without all the cartoon tits and pornographic references.... oh actually...

Without deviating, I can honestly say I'm feeling positive and hopeful. I yearn for a summer of old emo music and the best times with the most amazing people. I've got someone in my life who makes me so happy when we're together that I could die, every ignorant fucker I serve at work or happen to come across on facebook won't change the way I'm feeling right now. I just hope I've maintained enough of my humour to post here.... I've missed that feeling of a literary purge, and all the drama that comes with it.