My rejection from Cambridge a week ago has sunk me into a fear that i've been living in some fallacy where I can achieve what I want because I am just me. Last year the only exam i particularly revised for was law and i aced it. Now exams are back around and the whole prospect of having to study is reinvented I have this constant, mistaken niggling in the back of my head that I can do it without working for it. My rejection brought into hindsight that maybe I can't do that anymore.
It's 4.30pm and I failed to get dressed today. I am intent on studying for hours, I've studied a fair amount so far, but doubt is raging through me like hormones on the brink of puberty. Maybe I can't do it this time.
Asides annual exam-disaster I am completely consumed by love.
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